Dear Code Geass Fanfiction Writers
by mikanchan94
Summary: There are too many cliches, genderbenders, cross-dressing, lolitas, and other stereotypes floating around the fandom to address them all, but they can at least address some here. This is not meant to be taken seriously. Just humourously.
1. Suzaku

**AN: **I just suddenly had a flash of inspiration, and seriously wanted some lol's. Don't take this too seriously. I just wanted a good laugh.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Code Geass

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Dear Code Geass Fanfiction Writers,

What did I do to make you think that I wanted to RAPE Lelouch?! Since when did I get turned on by making him my obedient sex slave?!

That's just…that's just HORRIBLE!

Was it because of the Emperor meeting room thing? Was it because I smashed his face to the floor of the Kururugi Shrine?

I was just seriously PISSED OFF at the guy!

Please don't ever make me rape him again. Please. It was just plain disturbing.

Sincerely,

Suzaku

P.S. I doubt Lelouch would submit so easily either. In fact, I'm pretty sure he would have found a way to get out and kill me on the spot.

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**AN: **Don't worry Suzaku I'll protect you…for like a few seconds before Lelouch geasses me to kill you.

Also I promise that I'll have **Scandalous **up soon.


	2. Lelouch

**AN:** Here's another one from Lelouch this time. ^^

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Code Geass.

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To the Clearly Inebriated Code Geass Fanfiction Writers,

While I admit that I have a bit of a sister complex, I DON'T WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH HER!

Purge your imbecilic and perverted minds of those despicable thoughts!

I will have you all killed for such slander, and don't think you can hide behind your ridiculous usernames! I won't have you tainting Nunally's purity with such dirty thoughts!

Lelouch Lamperouge.

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**AN: **Lelouch is such a nice brother ^^.


	3. The Royal Holy Britannian Family

**AN: **Here's a decree from the Royal Holy Britannian Family.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Code Geass.

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To the Code Geass Fanfiction Writers,

Miraculously, you have managed to bind our family together to defeat a single cause: purge the internet of Royal Britannian incest.

There is hardly any love in this family and most of us would gladly off our half-sibling or step-mother. In fact we would do a number of things to our family.

Publicly humiliate: Yes.

Torture: Yes

Blackmail: It's not a family reunion without one.

Geass: Gladly.

Poison: Nobody drinks the punch from the bowl.

Hire Rolo to kill them with his baby face: One of the great pleasures in our lives.

So you see there are a multitude of things we would do to off one another, but having sex with them or having any kind of romantic interaction with them is not one of them.

If it wasn't clear to you, we _**HATE**_ each other. We want the throne just as badly as anyone else in the family, and no half-sibling love is going to get in our way. We do not have any UST around nor do we have giant family orgies and have sex all night long.

That mental image has scarred many of our siblings. In fact, those images were solely responsible for sending five of our family members to the psychiatric ward.

Therefore, it would be wise to cease this writing of Britannian incest before the Holy Britannian Empire takes over Fanfiction and Livejournal, and turn you all into Numbers.

Regards,

The Royal Britannian Family

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**AN: **Quick build up an army and defeat the Empire before it steals away the freedom to write incest! ^w^


	4. Minor Characters

**AN**: I sense a storm is brewing.

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing.

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To Code Geass Fanfiction Writers,

We minor character from Code Geass have stood idly by as you continue to use the major characters such as Lelouch, C.C., Suzaku, Kallen, and OCs in many of your fanfictions, and continue to ignore us minor characters.

Well we shall not tolerate this injustice anymore. We have stood forgotten or used as gags and supports for long enough. It is time for us to take a stand and fight for our right to be written as MAIN CHARACTERS!

The reign of the main characters are coming to a close. The time of minor characters are coming, and we shall rule the internet soon enough. We will raise our arms and voices. Our armies shall decimate your stories, and we will RISE!

We will be written in character, our character will be explored, and we shall have kingdoms of fandoms everywhere!

So enjoy the reign of major characters while they stand on their last legs, for the minority shall soon rule.

Join the army of minor characters while you still can and you will be spared from our wrath!

Regards,

V.V.

Tohdoh

Kaguya

Milly

Rivalz

Shirley

Clovis

Tien Zi

Li Xing Ke

Lloyd

Rakshata

Cecile

Anya

Diethart

Kanon

(Continue onto the next page for more minor characters.)

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**AN:** Uh-oh, they have finally decided to take a stand ;p


	5. Lelouch ii

**AN: **Oh I might get killed for this one.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Code Geass

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Dear Code Geass Fanfiction Writers,

Truthfully, I am still alive and kicking. I magically received my father's Code or I somewhere between the time gap I fulfilled my promise to C.C. and I now have her Code. I now live a solitary/regular/I'm super popular life 10/50/200/1000 years into the future. I'm not exactly sure where my setting is, it's a little hard to tell sometimes with all the mixed messages. However, even with my supreme awesomeness and other people's rather high intelligence some organization still decides to screw the world over. Either that or it's some kid who's either my love child, Suzaku's child, or some other random person who must find me so I can help him save the world. Did I also mention that I'm pregnant with Suzaku's child?

Anyway, just letting you know that I'm still kicking. So ha-ha fooled you.

Sincerely,

Lelouch

P.S.

That was all sarcasm. I'm dead. DEAD. D-E-A-D. _DEAD! _Just as you all will be if you don't stop insisting on bringing me back to life.

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**AN:** Oh, Lelouch you totally had us all fooled. ^^


End file.
